Friday 20th March is International Happiness Day – so let’s use all this positivity to bring more happiness into our family life!
I often hear, ‘If my kids get into the right school, get higher grades, better friends, boost their confidence or listen the first time THEN I will be happier’.
But why not look at it the other way around and say ‘I will work on my happiness first and then things will be ok’. When we are happy we are in a more positive and mindful place and great things will start happening around us. Whereas if we approach our issues from a downbeat position it will be hard work to turn things around for the better and to our benefit.
Happiness does not need to be a big thing (e.g. new house, well behaved kids, get into school, better grades etc.) but can start with the small things in life. When we focus on all the good in our life we start building on them and happiness will arrive, naturally. Soon the family will start to follow our mood and attitude towards life!
Of course no one can put a happy face on all the time, but just be aware, that a parent’s unhappiness or worries can easily be transferred to the child! Your child looks at you as a mirror for his own feelings. If you are worried you can’t reflect good feelings, all our kids want are happy parents! Sam; ‘I love the best to be with mummy when she is happy’!
How to be happier:
Let’s start with Gratitude: the quality of being thankful, readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.
As parents we spend a lot of time thinking about what is not working and why, what the kids and we did wrong. This means that 90% of the time we are not in the moment but rather in the past (what has gone wrong and why) or the future (how can we change this).
Try to enjoy the present small everyday things in life because one day they might be the most important thing e.g. walking to school with your child, seeing the smile in their eyes when we pick them up from school, ‘that’ special goodnight hug and ‘I Love you’, dinner together, a cuddle on the sofa etc.
So, for a moment think about what is working in your life right now that you can be thankful for?
What have you seen in your family life that is truly wonderful, the small things your child has said or done today. You will start to see and feel that they are all around you. Try not to take for granted the wonders you have everyday in your family.
- Notice and focus on 3 good things every day.
- Include your family by asking every day ‘what was good about your day today’ – teach your kids to focus on the good and positive and be grateful for it
- How can you mindfully focus on them and truly enjoy them?
So happiness does not need to be a big thing or a project that we need to plan and think about – all we need to do is grab what is already around us and show gratitude and wonder and we will feel the happiness grow.
Enjoy The Internal Day of Happiness, a great inspirational book for your children is: “Sam the Magic Genie” by Brian Maynn