‘Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind’ – Dr. Seuss
Parenting can be tough, but parenting before, during and after separation brings parenting to another level. But in addition, hanging out with friends who are not ‘healthy’ for you really does not help the situation.
You need people around you while you go through this, but not just anyone, you need radiators, not drains. Drains leave you feeling…well drained. Their negativity, need or low level of empathy can drain your self-esteem, happiness and coping strategies!
No, what you need is ‘Radiator Friends’. Who give out warmth, positivity and can understand what you feel without crying with you (and make you feel even worse). They know when you need to talk, cry or go out for some fun or fresh air in nature. They know when to leave you alone or when to ‘knock down your door’ to support you, hug you and hold you while you cry.
Surround yourself with people who make you happy, make you laugh and help you when you’re in need, who genuinely care about you and your situation!
Have a think about the people around you; who are drains and who are radiators? Makes sure you spend more time with radiators, seek them out or if you don’t have many, find them. Where can you find them? Well do you have a hobby, sport or job where you can connect with new people? Maybe join a support group for parents like you? Or why not try something new i.e. a sport, a hobby etc. Or be a bit ‘daring’, talk to that person next to you in the queue, doctors office, on the bus etc. you never know who they are, maybe they are the new radiator in your life!
The ParentingSuccess Team wishes you all the best
From the ParentingSuccess Team
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